I know she doesn't care, she doesn't even know she was supposed to be here... but I know. :(
How much longer must we wait to be together as a family?
You have heard the phrase "Adoption isn't for sissies!" And boy is THAT the truth! 14 months of waiting, of hopes, of dreams, of wondering, of paperwork, of longings, of wishing we had some control over it ... and that doesn't even count the time prior to our commitment to the girls. My heart was committed LONG before we were committed on paper.
I am just longing for Yana and Tavi to be here, with us, with ME. I want us to be "doing" for them. I want us to be LOVING on them. I want us to be teaching them all about what having a mommy and a daddy AND a family truly means! I want my husband to meet his daughters, at long last... and look at them with love in his eyes.
How long is half of forever? Because that seems to me to be about how long we have been waiting!
I am SOOO truly happy for all of my friends who are traveling to bring home their kiddos in the next couple of weeks! The orphaned, the abandoned, the lonely, the forgotten all coming home to Christian families IS ALWAYS a cause for sincere celebration! PRAISE JESUS!
BUT oh how my heart wants it to be US bringing OUR GIRLS HOME! To see so many who committed after us, already home with their little ones... IT IS GLORIOUS... but to keep it real... it can make my heart hurt quite a bit too. I am safe to say this because adopting parents everywhere understand how one can be truly happy for someone and so sad too. I dont' want them to NOT have their kids home, I just want MY girls home too!
Someday, I know they will be home... but right now half of forever is just too darned long!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET YANA JEWELL! MOMMY LOVES YOU SO MUCH! UNTIL YOU ARE IN MY ARMS AGAIN, MY HEART WILL REMAIN BROKEN! YOU DIDN'T GROW BENEATH MY HEART, BUT SWEETIE, YOU SURE GREW IN IT!!!!