Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Longing for my girls....

It has really hit me today, a need to meet my girls and hold them in my arms! Probably because I have a bloggy friend who is in the country of my girls with her husband, meeting their children for the first time! I am so excited for them! The kids both need to come home so badly, and they are so precious!

Anyway.... Girls, I want to give you something, in spirit at least. If you were here I would be holding you, dancing and singing this song! Girls, this song is for you! You are wonderfully made! You are daughters of the King of Kings! Girls, you are true princesses! I can't wait to be your mama! I pray that God blesses us all with the strength to make it through the wait! Till then girls "ROCK WHAT YOU GOT!"

WARNING: You will be wanting to turn your volume up loud! Listening to this song may lead to dancing, singing, and air guitar! Don't say I didnt' warn ya! :)

**** Lyrics to the song are further down, on the left side of my blog. :)

Monday, July 27, 2009

Konsider Katie...

I love this little girl! If not for my girls... I would be trying to bring her home.

I thought I would pass her video along in case someone out there is caught by her smile like I was. But I can't get it to work on my blog, so here is the link. I encourage you to watch and be touched by this little one!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

It's my birthday....

Everyone knows what I want. :) My girls home!

BUT my oldest baby girl, RILEY, came home from her 2 week mission trip in Alaska yesterday! WHOO-HOO! She had an amazing time, very eye opening, moving, and spiritually loaded. I will try and post a couple of pics later after she has them downloaded, and a few statements by her as well. :)

Thank you to all who read this blog. You are all a gift to me... encouraging me, inspiring me, touching me with your kind words... May God bless you all in your adoption journeys and/or your life as you seek Him more!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

One of my favorite all time passages...

1 John 3:16-18 (The Message)
16-17This is how we've come to understand and experience love: Christ sacrificed his life for us. This is why we ought to live sacrificially for our fellow believers, and not just be out for ourselves. If you see some brother or sister in need and have the means to do something about it but turn a cold shoulder and do nothing, what happens to God's love? It disappears. And you made it disappear.

When We Practice Real Love
18-20My dear children, let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love. This is the only way we'll know we're living truly, living in God's reality. It's also the way to shut down debilitating self-criticism, even when there is something to it. For God is greater than our worried hearts and knows more about us than we do ourselves.

If we are the body....

Did you know that children over 5 years old have a less than 20% chance of being adopted?

Did you know that there are over 143 million orphans in the world?

Did you know that more than 40% of Christians consider adopting and only 1% ever do?

Did you know there are around 2.1 billion people estimated to be Christians worldwide?

Consider these well know quotes by Mother Teresa:

When a poor person dies of hunger, it has not happened because God did not take care of him or her. It has happened because neither you nor I wanted to give that person what he or she needed.

You and I, we are the Church, no? We have to share with our people. Suffering today is because people are hoarding, not giving, not sharing. Jesus made it very clear. Whatever you do to the least of my brethren, you do it to me. Give a glass of water, you give it to me. Receive a little child, you receive me.

Ran across this in an online post. They are words from a song:
"I am Jesus' little lamb
Ever glad at heart I am
For my Shepherd gently guides me
Knows my needs and well provides me
Loves me every day the same
Even calls me by my name"

"Who so happy as I am
Even now the Shepherds lamb
And when my short life is ended
By His angel hosts attended
He shall fold me to his breast
Ever in His arms to rest!"

FYI: This little girl is looking for her forever family. This is a current picture. Are you the one Jesus is calling out to? Email: Her name is Edie. She just turned 3.

Friday, July 24, 2009

One of my favorite pics.... :)

When you come to the end of all the light you know, and it's time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: Either you will be given something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. -Edward Teller

**** My Riley gets back tomorrow from 2 weeks in Alaska! Woo Hoo!

Why being called "MOM" is about more than a name. ....

I am not only called Mom, I was called to BE a MOM!

I came to the realization a while ago that I was not like the other mothers in my circle of friends. I don't count the days till school starts like summer vacation is a form of torture [most days anyway:)]. I don't count the days or plan for a future when my kids are all grown with glee. I do look towards the future, and I want my kids to all grow and be wonderful adults who visit often and have love filled productive lives. I don't dislike all children but my own.

I am always the Park monitor mom. I don't mean to be, but I always fall into this roll. Pushing everyone elses kids, catching a baby on a slide that is WAY to big for them, redirecting the beginnings of a fight, cleaning up scraped knees and so on. This isn't just at the park,this befalls me everywhere. Even my kids ask why there are always so many kids around me! :)

I used to pray back when my husband said "NO" to more kids that God would take that burden from my heart and make the intense desire for children to go away. He didn't. If anything it got louder! I used to pray on my knees, with tears running down my face that I wanted that feeling gone if God chose not to answer the prayers of my heart for more children.

He answered it, and let me come to the most precious realization. I have been called to Him. And that means I am His, and I will be His to the best of my ability. But the specific task to which I am called is simply "MOM".

I have not been asked overseas on the mission field. I have not been asked to preach, or start a big organization with a Christian purpose. I have not been asked to be a youth leader, or to head multiple bible studies. I have been asked by God to be Mom. And until that changes, MOM I will stay.

That realization is what allowed me to be very open about special needs adoption. Before, I was open to special needs that were correctable, minor, or basically easily adjusted to. Mostly because I didn't see how to handle all that would be required of more intense special needs parenting. I was looking at the worlds standards of life and family and future and came away with the idea it would be crazy for us to think we could take on very much in the way of challenging special needs. But then I came to see, after much prayer and reflection, that the yearnings of my "mothers heart" was not just coming from inside me as a reflection of who I was, but of who GOD made and wanted me to be. I realized that He was asking me to step out in faith and parent a child that may not live on their own as an adult. And do you know once I realized that I had such a sense of peace come over me and SO MUCH of my life, my thoughts, my hearts directives suddenly made more sense. My GOD is a SPECIFIC GOD and He allowed me to catch a glimpse of all that He had done to prepare my heart to say YES when He called me to this.

My husband is apprehensive, but willing to listen and trust and travel with me in this adoption journey. Praise God. :)

So with this process I was led to my girls. Shawnee who is blind, but sounds like she will thrive in a family and be able to do whatever she desires, will soon be sisters to Yana. Yana is 6 1/2. She has Down syndrome and hydrocephalus. She is not walking. Is indifferent to the presence of adults or other children. Does not interact. Does not talk, except for a few syllable sounds. She doesn't do much at all... After reading all this I thought oh my... I don't know God, are You sure shes the one? ... BUT there was one little sentence, that after all this, God allowed to grab a hold of my heart and not let go.

Now I suppose so far all I have said will only be understood if you believe and understand the faith and reflection I am talking about. Sometimes it all seems a little crazy to me too if I look at it all as a person and not as a child of God. One who loves Him, wants to please Him, wants to worship and glorify Him, and trusts Him with His plan for my life.

Why would I want to live a life that can be lived w/o God in it? I asked myself this last night. And I said to myself [I do talk to myself alot :)] "I don't!" I KNOW that to bring the girls home, parent them, raise them and have the money, time and resources to do so on top of our 7 other children will not be a man sized task, but a GOD SIZED TASK!

Bring home my girls Lord! I am ready and willing!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Other little tidbits of honesty....

*** Do you know that all the dirty laundry goes in a couple of baskets in my room waiting to be washed? And do you know that at times, often times, it is so large a pile that my kids - all ages 16 on down- take turns diving off my bed into it and no one even gets hurt?!

*** Do you know that if the weather is really humid, my house can smell like dog or cat pee because I hvae house trained WAY TO MANY animals on this current carpet and having it professionally cleaned only helps for a while!? I burn alot of candles!

*** Do you know that my 3 year olds favorite song to sing at the top of his lungs is "I like big butts and I can not lie!"???? And I did not teach him that song, I dont' even think my kids taught him, but my kids friends! And he usually follows it by singing his next favorite song "Oh no you never let go" ... a worship song!

*** Do you know that we had an old TV stand in our hallway that every night we would move over by the front door so know one ran into it at night, only to move it back again in the morning!? No joking, we did this for 6 months before we got rid of the thing!

*** Did you know that a year ago I wanted a pot bellied pig for a pet in the house and my husband said he'd leave me if I did that? I thought that was a really mean thing to say! And you know, I think he was serious, and at the time disappointed that I didn't move a pig in just so he could have a break from our chaotic, hectic, spontaneous, crazy, busy, loud, cantankerous, competitive, never enough time in the day, exuberant, caring, joy filled, loving, laughter filled, laid back, go with the flow, unique and wonderful life!?

See, now you can't feel too questioning about your own life can you? LOL

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Helping Tori!

Little Tori has CP and hydrocephalus. Can you help her come home? This is the last little bit they need. They are traveling soon.

Beautiful version!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

God is just amazing... but you already knew that. :)

I just have to share, just so you understand ...

Paid so far for this adoption.

1. Fee to "save" the two girls for us as we get our paper work done stateside.
2. Agency fee
3. Homestudy fee
4. Bits and pieces ie physicals, copies, marriage certs, birth certs. etc.

*** We did not have savings for this. God provided the means for each one! No, he didn't just make a check mysteriously come in the mail... that is what I was eagerly anticipating. :) But he made the [almost exact] amounts we needed each step of the way available or the means to get those amounts available and it just humbles me to think about it! It gives me chills to know my Heavenly Father is taking care of us and our girls with such specific care and detail.

*** Right now we are needing funds for USCIS clearance as soon as our HS is done, I have it ready to send in! That fee is about 900 dollars. I am also getting my passport. That fee is about 115 dollars. We just got our tax refund in the mail... Anyone care to hazard a guess as to what the total check was? Yep... just over 1000 dollars! Praise God! Some of you naysayers may call it coincidence, I call it Divine Provision!

So that leaves me updating the total we have and the total we need thermometer on the left side of this blog! God is AWESOME! But like I said, you already knew that!

some honesty....

You know in looking at alot of my blog friends posts, they just seem to hvae the nicest family and have everything together and have a really nice clean and decorative home! Now, I am guessing this isn't true... that their life is not always peachy and that they are not always happy and don't always have it together,and that their home may be in need of some major repairs ..

The fact is, being a good adoptive family for a child does not require all the things that the world deems imperative. And I think it is to the devils delight if we focus on these things and they make us not reach out to a child in need, for we feel unworthy!

Some examples from my own life:

1. All the bedrooms in my house need painted, or wall paper torn down, or closets, or new carpet... none of them have matching curtains or bedspreads, none of them have a light fixture, none of them have "pottery barn kids" decor. But my kids like their rooms anyway.

2. I have 7 kids. As a whole they DO NOT get along great. They each have someone they get along with better than others. But if you want brutal honesty, they fight, ALOT. They love each other too, but sometimes it is easy to forget that for all the arguing and competitiveness that goes on! My oldest son, well he doesnt' seem to like anyone right now. That is the honest truth. I am praying for him.

3. We do not have savings. We have some assets. We have some credit card debt. Much more than we wish we did, but not so much I can't sleep at night.

4. We yell at our kids, sometimes for not much reason. Sometimes, we wish they would just be quiet and go away. :) But we love them to pieces, and we feel we are doing the best we can and hope they see it that way too once they are grown.

5. There is more dirt than grass in our yard. We hide all the crud in our yard in our garage when company comes.

6. I don't do craft projects with the kids. I should, but I don't.

7. I have to nag them to do chores. They do them, but they gripe the whole time.

There is nothing wrong with having or doing any of these things. I just want some of those questioning adoption to realize that a perfect life, house, family etc. is not a requirement for being able to provide a child with a loving, supportive, christian home! We are all a work in progress. Dont' let what you don't have or can't provide be the deciding factor all on its own! :)

Monday, July 20, 2009

Snatched from another blog... hee, hee, hee...

Thanks Tammy, I just had to borrow it! :)

Inspired by a friend, lets make a list....

Okay, so what should go with me to entertain the girls when I travel for my first trip to meet them. Most likely I will visit each girl for about a hour or hour and half. I would love to just spend the whole day every day I am there with them, but that won't happen. :( Remember that Shawnee is blind and at a 2 year old level, and Yana is developmentally at about a 2 year old level as well. Neither child walks on their own, but they will soon enough with a family's love!

So things I have thought of:
- simple music makers
- textured ball
- stacking cups
- vibrating toy
- photo album for Yana
- digital camera
- mini voice recorder
- CD player or I-pod
- different textured paper or material [something along these lines, I haven't quite found what I am thinking of yet...]
- oranges [In country fruit. Yana only eats from a bottle, so I was thinking of something that smells good for Shawnee]
- hats
- infant wrist rattle or feet rattle
- oh, and a sweet quiet jack in the box

As you can see, I dont' have a great idea of just what I should take but those are things I was thinking of. Any ideas are appreciated!

Sunday, July 19, 2009

My thoughts about my girls in a nutshell...

.....First off, I haven't been real busy this weekend, and my free time seemed to be spent thinking of the length of time it will take my girls to come home, and surfing the computer w/o much purpose. Which, consequently, I think I left a comment on every single blog I follow! Which, consequently, means my house is a disaster zone because with this many people under one roof one just doesn't have the choice to neglect much for long!

.....But my point of this post is this: "I have come to a decision. In looking at the photos of my girls, and thinking of them alone and without a family it occurred to me that they had already been abandoned by the very people that God had entrusted them to.

Now this doesn't make their birth families bad people. It makes them human. And being human, they are subject to the same fallacy of thought that has been with us since the beginning of time. To so many of us here in the US that have had the benefit of knowing that a disability does not make one unworthy, it seems unreal that so many children are abandoned for just that reason. But the fact is, most likely these birth families had NO options... at least none that they had been taught was an option. There are no programs for special needs individuals in this country. There is none, or very, very little governmental aid. And the accepted practice is to abandon ones child to an orphanage, for it is not "right" to value an individual with a disability. My point is, successful examples, education, and workable options ARE A BLESSING that is easily taken for granted. And I have no doubt that while they shoved their feelings to the back burner... the heart of my childrens mothers were breaking in two.

These mothers felt that they had no choice but to abandon the children that God gifted to them. My heart has realized that I have no choice either. I will not abandon the children that God has given as a special gift to my mothers heart! God willing, someday I will be able to let these mothers know that their daughters are loved and thriving. If not, then I pray God grants them a sense of peace about what they felt they had to do.

So, 5 months and counting till I get to hold them in my arms like I am holding them in my heart!

Psalm 5:3

3 In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice;
in the morning I lay my requests before you
and wait in expectation.

Psalm 36:6-7

6 He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

7 Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him...

No lying allowed. :) A little about me, courtesy of facebook.

Can you fill this out without lying?

What's the last thing you put in your mouth?

Have you ever kissed anyone named Matthew?

Who was the last person you rode in a car with under the age of 20?
My daughter, Riley

Can you play guitar hero?
Yep, but my kids make fun of me!

Name someone that made you laugh today?
Luke, he makes me laugh everyday!

How late did you stay up last night and why?
12:00 a.m. ... on the computer

If you could move somewhere else, would you?

Ever been kissed under fireworks?

Do you like calling or texting better?
calling, but truly I just hate telephones

How do you feel about Diet Dr Pepper?
One of the best drinks ever invented!

When was the last time you cried really hard?
really hard? ...
Hhhmmm, I am not a big cryer. Probably over the ASPCA commerical where they sing "in the arms of an angel..." It turns me into a baby!

Where is your father right now?
Probably at his home in Nebraska napping.

Where are you at right now?
at home

What bed did you sleep in last night?
My own, along with Luke, John and my cat and dog. :) It's crowded...

What was the last thing someone bought for you?
My mom bought me a little gold squirrel... hey I have a thing for squirrels. :)

Who was the last person you took a picture of?

Was yesterday better than today?
no, yesterday pretty much sucked

Can you live a day without TV?
Only in the summer!

Are you mad about anything?
Yep, there are too many abandoned and unloved children in this world!

Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Oh yes I do!

When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?
Every morning I wake up... still needing to lose those extra pounds!

Are you a bad influence?
I don't think so

Night out or night in?
In.... usually, not always

Are you more of an individual or an outgoing person?
I don't get this question. What's an individual person?

What items could you not go without during the day?
my anitdepressant ... LOL. Well I can, but most people don't want me to.

Would you share a drink with a stranger?
Yep! I have and will.

Do you think its right for straight guys to get their tongue pierced?
I think it's stupid for anyone to get their tongue pierced, does that count?

Have you ever thrown shoes on a telephone wire?
No, and I probably couldn't if I tried.

What does the last text message in your inbox say?
"MOM, when r u comin home?"

How do you feel about your life right now?
Pretty good

How many times have you been pulled over by the police?
0 when I was driving

Do you hate anyone?
No.... but I am starting to really, really dislike our president!

If we were to look in your inbox, what would we find?
A bunch of boring e-mails.

Did you have a valentine this year?

Last person you talked to on the phone?

Can you easily tell if someones fake?

How's your heart?
healthy, and full of love

Say you were given a drug test right now, Would you pass?
I should certainly hope so, but I did eat a lemon poppyseed muffin this morning. I hear poppy seeds can turn a drug test positive. Did you know that?!

Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
Yes. But they are sadly mistaken....

What song is stuck in your head?
"Lookin for a new car, which ones me a cool convertible or an SUV. Too bad I didn't know my credit was wack, now I'm driving off the lot in a used sub compac. F R E E that spells free credit report . com baby....."

Someone knocks on your window at 2 am, who do you want it to be?
Shemar Moore ;) ... It would totally freak me out so it had best be REAL important!

Wanna have kids before you’re 30?
I had kids before I was 20, well kid anyway!

What do you have to do this week?
Not much besides the usual.

Can you whistle?
Yes I can.

Do you sleep on your side, stomach, or back?
Any way but on my stomach! That gives me a major headache!

What gets in your way of your sleeping?
The kids, the cats, the dogs, my husband... you name it. My sleep is the least of anyones concern. :)

Are your eyes the same color as your mom's or dad's?
Neither. They both have blue, I have blue green.

Has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?
No, I don't think so. They usually comment on my teeth or my smile. Once my little sister told me I had, and I quote, "the perfect nose!". Not even sure what she meant. :) Never noticed my nose before that... but now I can give you a list of what I dont' like about it. Thanks Erin!

Do you think too much or too little?
Too much most likely

Do you smile a lot?
I think so.

Who was your last missed call on your cell phone?
My son, Logan

Do you get 8 hours of sleep everyday?
Umm, NO!

What was the last book you read?
Sooner or Later ... It's a romance novel.

Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?:
No. He is only 8!

What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
I was on Facebook... which I can say I really do not like. But I dont know why I go there....

Honestly, who was the last person to tell you that they love you?

Did you have an exciting last weekend?
My life is not real exciting... I like it that way, it means no one has had a major injury lately.

Have you ever crawled through a window?
Yes, but only to get onto the roof. :)

Do you like yourself?
Most days.

Have you ever dyed your hair?
Nope. Just highlighted it slightly.

Are you wearing a necklace?

Are you an emotional person?
Yes, I am!

What's something that can always make you feel better?
The smell of vinegar, grapefruit, fresh cut grass, and cantelope. The sound of childrens laughter, the sight of baby animals playing together, the sight of a new baby, the sight of my kids being happy and getting along. The presence of my husband, his sense of humor, his voice, his smell [diesel fuel, cows, hay, and sweat... its a farm woman thing :)]....

Will this weekend be a good one?
Yep, Riley will be home!... well I guess that is next weekend, but still

What do you want right now?
My new babies to be home!

Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothing?
Yes, I love to do that.

Look behind you, what do you see?
My piano, which is very sad looking and covered with dust... thanks alot!

Have you ever worked in a food place?
Dairy Queen, I used to make a kick butt Ice Cream cone including the little swirly thing on top!

What would you name your future daughter?
Yana, Shawnee, and Tavi. :) [notice 3 names, but only 2 girls coming home. :)]

Whats on your schedule for tomorrow?
Nothing new, cooking, cleaning, keeping track of Luke, letting the dogs out, letting the dogs in, going swimming, mailing bills, hearing "I'm bored" before I am even out of bed! ... etc.


Pray for Bowe!

By PAMELA HESS and LOLITA BALDOR, Associated Press Writers Pamela Hess And Lolita Baldor, Associated Press Writers – 12 mins ago

WASHINGTON – The Pentagon has identified the American soldier who went missing June 30 from his base in eastern Afghanistan and was later confirmed to have been captured. The Defense Department said in a statement Sunday that the soldier is Pfc. Bowe R. Bergdahl, 23, of Ketchum, Idaho. The statement also says his status is now classified as missing-captured, rather than whereabouts unknown.

In a video posted online by the Taliban on Saturday, he's heard saying he's "scared I won't be able to go home."....

I urge you to read the article and read the video! At one point in the video the soldier addresses the american people saying we have the power to bring other prisoners and him home. You bet we do! Prayer is more powerful than anything on this earth! God has got this! Lets pray him home!!!!!

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Which child is not His?

Feeling really troubled today..

To be honest, I just dont' know if I can do it! At least that is what I am feeling last night and today. How can I wait a year to bring these girls home? I think to myself, there are alot of domestic situations I would welcome, and they could happen so much quicker. There are even quicker international programs! The travel may be tougher... but to have it happen quicker might be worth the extra headache or extra money!

The need is so great all over! Kids all over the world need homes now! But I know there is a very good chance that Yana will not be adopted. She is 6 1/2, low functioning, with health issues. Shawnees chances of adoption drop every day as she gets closer to age 4...

And then there is the fact that my heart really is connected to these babies! But it is so hard having my life on hold for what I know will be a long journey! I know families that have waited longer, I know some that didn't wait much at all.

I prayed this morning, asking for clarity, for a sign that showed me the path to take. Nothing. Not that I meant right now or not at all... but I really need something today to help me settle my heart! And truthfully, I am probably being a baby! I want them home before Christmas, and I dont' see that happening. :( And then, I realize that those feelings are all about me and what I want! Sure I want the girls home ASAP for their own sake, but if I choose a different route, I am choosing only for myself, what is easiest for me. :(

I always, always thought how great it would be to do international adoption and be matched with a waiting child as you went through the whole process. That was part of the appeal of my chosen country, that you were "matched" pre-referral so the child you chose would not be matched with someone else! I have now realized that I dont' like it! I would rather have all the paperwork done, then get matched and travel very quickly after that!

I have a terrible headache today, and I am afraid it is from all the stress of this whole procedure/journey! This has all been building, but I have always pushed it back with positive thoughts... not able to do that today I guess. I jsut wonder if these two little girls will ever really be home with me! :(

And I am wondering what in the world I should do? I really need a sign God! Really, truly... I dont' mean to beg or show You what a wimp I am... I just need to know where I am supposed to be going here, I need to know what to do here!!!!

Friday, July 17, 2009

No Timid Life For Me!

Romans 8:15 (The Message)

15-17This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It's adventurously expectant, greeting God with a childlike "What's next, Papa?" God's Spirit touches our spirits and confirms who we really are. We know who he is, and we know who we are: Father and children. And we know we are going to get what's coming to us—an unbelievable inheritance! We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times with him, then we're certainly going to go through the good times with him!

I LOVE this verse in this translation! Did you catch that? We did NOT recieve "a timid, grave-tending life!" Praise God! Be bold for Christ! What or where is He calling you to in His name? Why are you hesitating!? Step out in faith, and say "YES" to His will for your life!

My wonderful, creative, loving, inspiring, faithful, giving, caring GOD!

No news on our HS.

But I am greatly blessed today just the same! I have been so inspired and my faith strengthened by the happenings of all the adoptions and journeys of my "blog" and Reeces rainbow friends. GOD is moving mountains on behalf of the orphans of the world! To see it and hear it first hand leaves me feeling so greatly blessed, inspired, excited, peaceful, joyful, thankful, and just plain lucky! In the words of Hannibal from the "A-Team" [a show I used to love ;)] "I LOVE IT WHEN A PLAN COMES TOGETHER!"

Thank you Father for letting me see Your heart! May I always say yes when You call! May I trust in Your provision to see my girls home and into my arms! I worship you Lord, I love You! You are amazing! In Jesus name, Amen!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

A fundraiser for a friends adoption ...

... of a beautiful little girl! Check it out, these bows are adorable! They even have a great hair bow with adoption themes!

Bows for Hailee

you know what is annoying?

The phone rings. I answer it. I hear "Please hold while we transfer you to the next available representative." AND I find myself holding briefly before I have the presence of mind to HANG UP THE PHONE! There go 5 seconds of my life I can never get back! ;)

Have I told you lately how much I hate telemarketers? I have decided to start asking them if they are a Christian. At least be productive.... ;)

I just love this little guy!

Sergey in available for adoption in Eastern Europe. Is he not a huggable little chunk of love? He will soon be 2!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Visit my friends blog and be blessed by her journey to her son!

Alysha is a wonderful blog world friend and a joy and inspiration to me in my adoption journey! She is in the country of her son now meeting him for the first time! Praise God!

I have a confession to make...

... I do not like finding out that people that I meet do not have a relationship with God that is healthy and heaven bound. In fact, as soon as I find out I want to close myself away from them. It is not because they are beneath me! It is because I am sad and scared for them, and I just don't see how to help them. I just don't wanna know about if they will go to heaven or not. My friends, my childrens friends, family etc. .... I guess I am just "innocent or oblivious in my ideals" and am shocked to find out that there are people that really don't go to church ... AT ALL!

... I can not imagine what it is like to live in the USA, have GOD freely available, easily accessible, not have to fight to learn more about him, and choose not to KNOW HIM!

... I want to have the name of my SAVIOR tattooed on my body for all to see! I want them to know I am the daughter of a KING! I want them to know how much they matter to GOD ... that their Heavenly Father is waiting patiently to bring them into His arms as one of his precious adopted children! And I want them to know how much God's heart aches when they choose to say "NO" to all He has freely given! I want them to see that this life and all its trials and struggles are temporary! There is so much more for them.... and I am just not good at evangelizing.

AND I tell you, these "unchurched, unreached people" are coming out of the woodwork! I think there is a holy conspiracy going on with my name on it!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

And ....

My children...

Riley [girl]16
Logan 14
Nolan 13
Cale 11
Quincy[girl] 9
James 8 [domestic soon to be adopted]
Lucas 3 [domestic adoption]

The 2 girls we are adopting:
[Yana 6]
[Shawnee 3]

My birthday is July 26. :) .... I am getting old! I will be 35! But my husband is still older than me ;)

More pics, following the post below. :)

The only picture I could find of my poor middle son, Nolan. :( ... I have some recent ones from his birthday that are awesome, but they are on my digital camera which is with my daughter on her way to Alaska! Guess they will have to wait. :)

Yee-haw! Riley and Quincy.

Pictured are my daughters Riley and Quincy,and my sons James and Lucas.:)

For Alysha and Adeye :)... (and anyone else wondering what we look like :))

In order left to right, Logan, Luke, Me, Riley and my niece Macy.

Two pics of my oldest son, 2nd in line, Logan doing what he likes best!

A not so good pic of me giving my oldest and heavy son a piggy back ride.:)

My husband, John. This is last summer, our 4th day on vacation. LOL :)

My oldest daughter, Riley, and my 4th child, Cale. Yes, it is a cheesy pic :)!

James, a year ago... but he looks the same, just taller :)!

Sunday, July 12, 2009

My cute baby...

Isn't he adorable!? We had a great day at the pool today! Luke is 3 1/2 and he is almost swimming! He likes to dunk himself underwater and I panic and pull him up after I count to 5 because he is just sitting there under water! Don't you think that is abnormal? LOL .... He is a go getter and he is going to be the one child of mine that will make me think in-patient therapy sounds like a vacation!

Duncan Yo-Yo...

I think I may invest in this stock, anyone know if thats possible? I figure we have a lot in common, like the Duncan yo-yo... I'm up, I'm down, I'm up, I'm down... and so on!

Today I am once again feeling overwhelmed with doubt as to our ability to complete this adoption. And though lacking finances can bring it on, today it is just the continuation of paper work that has me think 1. I am an idiot! And 2. it will never get completed.

Now, no worries, I am sticking with it... how could I not? But I just think "are we really talking a year from now"? That seems like half of forever.... Please join me in praying that late 2009 or very early 2010 is still possible!

*** People often tell me just how patient I am. Apparently no one knows the real me ;)
I was just like this when I was pregnant too! I am terrible at waiting!!!!!

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Orphans deserve better!

I just signed a petition to urge Warner Brothers to contribute a portion of the proceeds of the movie Orphan to help the boys and girls who share the movie's name.

Orphan is a horror movie depicting a 9 year old orphan girl who haunts her adoptive family and everyone she comes into contact with. Please click on the link below and sign the petition. You will also have an opportunity to share your own orphan story on the site and read other families' orphan stories. Please spread the word about this important message. Perhaps this attack on the most vulnerable children can be somehow turned around to actually help them

** original post on

Friday, July 10, 2009

My baby is going on her first mission trip!

My oldest daughter, Riley, is 16. She is leaving at 10 a.m. for Dallas, TX. She will spend 4 days there and then her group is off for a mission trip to Alaska! She is going with a great group from our old church. Along with this group are 2 awesome adults! And the trip is part of the ministry/missions of Global Expeditions. So she is in good hands.

I am so proud of her! She has a wonderful heart for God and is not afraid to share it. Please pray with me that the Lord is able to work through her and that while she is ministering to others, the Lord can use this trip to also strengthen her faith and love in and for Him!

I had never even thought about participating in a mission trip at 16! She is a such a neat girl, and I know the Lord has blessed her with so many special gifts. I am so overjoyed that she is using these gifts to help others find the Lord! What more can a parent ask for???\

*Riley is the one on the left. I am on the wrong computer. All our pics are on the laptop, but I did find this one from this past winter. Her friend is Mollie and she is going on the trip too!

He looks like the sweetest little boy!

I just want to hold him and help him to smile!

Here is his limited info:

Boy, Born December 29, 2001

Main diagnosis: Spina Bifida Aperta; Hydrocephalus interna; Paraplegic. Good physical and mental development.

For more information, visit this link:

Thursday, July 9, 2009

It's impossible!.... NOT!

God is looking for people through whom He can do the impossible. What a pity we plan only the things we can do by ourselves. --- A.W. Tozer

Well, God found me. Here I am. Adopting 2 special needs girls from a foreign country. Adding 2 more to our 7 children. Living dollar by dollar. Making a living in an industry that is at best uncertain and pretty much guarantees that we will stay cash poor. Having a 3 year old that is a handful with no off button. Having a 14 year old that is having a good day if he is only mildly angry. Having a husband who fluctuates between "Sure lets do this" and "Are we [specifically me] out of our minds!?" Having some debt, no savings, and needing a large amount of money to see this adoption through. Having to reconfigure a bedroom situations without much room to speak of or closet space! And not having alot of extended family excitement with our decision.

And you know what the best part is???? I am EXCITED! THRILLED! JAZZED! OVERJOYED! HAPPY! And can not wait to see what God has planned in order for me to bring my daughters home! See, to me, it does seem impossible for me/us to do this! And yet, I have no doubt tonight [though occassionally it catches me :)] that they will come home!

God continues to confirm my decision and my heart about Yana and Shawnee. He has sent me a multitude of friends [my personal multitude of angels!] who I have never even "officially met", who have strengthened me in untold ways with their stories, their faith, their kind words, and their wisdom! Thank you dear friends!

He has let the love I feel for these 2 little girls be birthed in my heart with a passion to see this journey through, and to love them as they are today, tomorrow, and years from now! Oh how I think of them throughout my day. Every time I see something they might like, or something they might need, or get a quiet moment and think I wish I could be holding them now... my heart bursts with love for them. I would not have believed it could be this way... and yet... God knew. God knows. God has plans for me, my husband, my children, my new girls... plans to give us a hope and a future.

Thank you glorious Father! I am Yours! I love You!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Don't let him become one of the forgotten!

Do you know someone interested in adopting? Or better yet, ever consider adopting a child yourself? Now, maybe you haven't ever thought of adoption as something you would ever do... why not? Why not you? Don't listen to the world telling you that you are too old, its to expensive, its to invasive, it just isnt' done, its crazy, it wouldn't work etc...

Now, I don't pretend to know or understand your reasons why adoption is not for you or not for you at this time in your life. But I know there is someone out there who is feeling the pull, and I say to that person "None of the reasons for saying "no" are bigger than what God can overcome!!!" So if HE is speaking to your heart... LISTEN! If HE is calling on you to reach out and change the world of this child "LISTEN"!

Meet Kirill! Can you not see the love of the FATHER in his eyes?! What can inquiring to Andrea for more info. hurt?

Here is Kirills info:
Kiril # 3 (1)

Boy, Born January 20, 2004


This spunky little angel is ready to melt your heart! Kiril has blonde hair and hazel eyes, and a smile that can light up a room! He was born with cerebral palsy.

One of our own adoptive families who visited with him in March 2008 said this about Kiril: " I�m a sucker for blondies and this little guy with his green-brown eyes is adorable! He smiled and wanted to interact with me when I came into the room despite the cries of his neighbor. His smiles were brief but heartwarming and then he was curious about what I was up to. Each time the camera flashed he rewarded it with a great grin! Except it was always right AFTER the flash so I couldn�t capture his sweet smile."

These new pictures are from July 2009, when another of our adoptive families visited with him. Kiril is still not able to sit up on his own, and not able to walk. He is very much still a baby, but he is already 5 1/2.

UPDATE: Kirill has been sent to the institution now, as pictured above. He will remain bedridden for life if he is not adopted. PLEASE save Kirill from this fate!! He needs a committed family RIGHT NOW. With therapy and a loving family and some mobility tools, he will be a very functional and much loved member of anyone's family!

Please contact Andrea directly for more information

I have $1445 in my grant fund towards the cost of my adoption


Tuesday, July 7, 2009

More on the Heart of God and my heart for Him...

147+ million orphans world wide! How does one person make a difference?

One heart, one child at a time! And the really neat thing is that God loves that one child more than everyone in the world ever could. That one child is special, magnificent, and fearfully and wonderfully made!!! God knit them together in the womb, and God has not, nor will He ever forget about them!

Consider how much your heart breaks for each individual child, and then realize just how much more so the heart of God breaks! He will not leave them as orphans, HE will come for them. HE HEARS THEIR CRIES, AND THEIR SILENCE!

God is moving GREATLY on behalf of the forgotten of this world! We want it done and taken care of yesterday, God has a bigger plan! Salvation, eternity, GLORY... are at stake! It will take a warriors heart to continue the fight! It will take a passionate, faithful, and brave soul to follow God as he leads us to where the treasures, at the end of this journey, are greater than any eyes have seen, any ears have heard, any mind can imagine!

We can not be silent! I will not be silent! I wear a button with my girls picture on it just so people will ask me what it is all about. And I tell them, its about love, its about 2 special little girls, its about forgotten children, and family, and mostly its about God!!!! Be the voice of the child that has long ago realized no one will answer their cry... and start a ripple that will carry across the oceans!

One at a time! I thank God everyday that He opened my eyes, and that I am a part of this great movement on behalf of children, HIS children! I look at all those precious faces of abandoned children and I hear the Father calling! I see the love He freely gives! I get energized with HOPE and JOY in my Heavenly Father! :)

So while my heart breaks with each child calling out for a family, so does it rejoice! I rejoice because God hears, God listens, God loves, God cares, and most especially God MOVES on behalf of the orphan! God will not forget the forgotten, and God will make it right! In this life of the next.

Children matter to God! EACH individual child matters to God! Oh that they would know the love their Father has for them!

Each person is created for a specific purpose.

Eph. 2:10... "For we are His workmanship. Created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which He prepared in advance for us to do."

God chose to bless me with a love of children that carries beyond enjoyment. He granted me with a voice so that I may be their voice. He granted me with a mothers heart that has no desire to move on to other things.

God grant me clarity and courage that I may speak for those that have no voice. Grant me time I do not have, grant me energy I can not find, grant me money that is not there, grant me ideas I have not formed, grant me a heart full of passion to do what many say can not be done. Do not let me waste my life. I am a mother Lord, gather my children.... Amen.

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Sunday, July 5, 2009

Is it possible?

Is it realistic to expect / ask God to help us raise / find $16,000 to bring our babies home from Eastern Europe?

We can borrow the money, but we pray not to have to do this, as we would rather have that money to spend on their health right away and the other needs of our children.

I heard that Rick Warren started his church on a credit card. I know missionaries rely on donations from their congregations. Is it right for me to feel a peace that God WILL provide this money for the girls "ransom"? Sometimes I feel like they are a gift for me, and I wonder if it is right to pray for God to provide the means to bring them home. Does that make sense to anyone? It isn't just about the girls... they need a mommy... but I may need them just as much.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

The Heart Of God...

Does it break Gods heart when a child cries and no one seems to care?

Does it break Gods heart when a crying child falls silent because they finally understand that no one will answer?

Does it break Gods heart when He says to us "GO" and we say "not now"?

Does it break Gods heart to say to us "Be my hands and feet" and we say "not me"?

Does it break Gods heart when the lonely finally give up, when the least of these are forgotten, when we refuse to take the hand of our enemies and bring them out of the depths of their struggles?

Does it break Gods heart when we turn from Him again and again fearing our problems are bigger than our God?

Does it break Gods heart when we stay silent about our Love for Him, our Joy in Him, our Peace from Him, our salvation because of the death of His beloved Son?

Does it break Gods heart to know that what is dearest to His heart leaves ours unaffected?

The cry of the orphan, the loneliness of the widow, the suffering of the prisoner, the hunger of the poor, the hopelessness of the unredeemed? Do they break your heart like they do Gods?

I pray for myself, my loved ones, and for my dear friends that read this blog:

May that which breaks the heart of God break your heart as well!

1 John 3: 16-24