Thursday, January 21, 2010

A good day....

Today was a good day! Sadly we only got videos of Tavi, no pictures. But really cute videos! :) She was being really cute today. She sang a lot to me, said "mama love you." "Tonis [or Mama, or Slavkas] shoe", and all that she said yesterday. She copied a longer rhythm and was a little tired so more snuggly and less active ... which was nice for me as I love to hold her. Michele is in love with her and I am going to have to watch so she doesn't sneak her out and bring her home! LOL

It is so amazing to me to watch her little mind work and take in everything we do together. She is SO skilled at observing, and so quick! She leaves all 3 of us [Toni, Michele, and I] speechless often! I love her so much. Half my heart is staying in Bulgaria and it will not be whole till I hold them both once again in my arms, and for the rest of my life!

Yana had a great day today. Sadly she has caught a cold, and I think she got it from Tavi [note to parents adopting 2 children... wash the toys WELL if you can between sharing with the kids]. But she was snuggly, and smiling and crawled to me if I put her down. I love this little girl to pieces. She just makes me smile.

We found out from the director that Yana had been scheduled to be transfered to an adult mental institution... and not a good one. She is the size of a 2-3 year old and developmentally about 8-12 months old. The whole orphanage is so happy for her. When the director found out that Toni had found a family for her, she was able to keep her in the orphanage. From the very first time I saw her picture, she grabbed hold of my heart. I don't know why. She had severe special needs, her picture wasn't one of the cutest listed, and she was much older than we had initially been open towards. So why her? But the grip she had on my heart was firm.

As some of you know, when we inquired about Tavi, we asked for a few other childrens profiles. Out of all these children there was only 1 girl who could be adopted with Tavi at no extra cost. That was Yana. Okay, hhmmm, coincidence? And then we asked Toni if she could get more info. She was going to try, and we prayed she could get an updated picture though Toni said it was unlikely. But praise God, she got a positive update and a couple of new pics! :) And so with doubts of our ablities, but no doubt about Gods we said yes to both Yana and Tavi!

It has become very apparent to me what a "GOD DIRECTED" trip this adoption is. What if we had said no? What if we said her needs were to severe? What if we weren't willing to risk it, to take a chance? What if we felt the cost of raising 2 more kids was too steep? What if we had said "not me God, not now God, not her God!" ....

For Yana to be sent to this institution would have meant the death of this child. Once you meet her you will understand how big of a loss to this world that would be. She is a little light that shines beyond the evil of this world. She is a work of God, created to show HIS glory to all of us. I love her so much!

I am truly, truly humbled that God chose John and I to parent her. I wish everyone could be me in this moment, could feel what I feel when I hold her and Tavi, when I see them smile, or hear them laugh, or they reach for me! Joy this great should never have been mine, I am not worth... so not worth it. But I am keeping it. I am embracing it. And I will forever be thankful to and glorify God for the gift of these girls. I can never repay, I can NEVER repay... the gift of these girls is priceless.

Thanking God for you all tonight, for the prayers directed towards this journey, for the donations, for the abundance of help for my family at home, and just for being you! Thank you!

A couple of pics, and I will let you go:


  1. Love the last picture of you and Yana. Also loved the pictures of little Tavi John yesterday. Are her eyelashes REALLY that long? Luke has a little competition huh?
    Andy wants to know if Tavi or Yana have asked about Grandpa Andy?
    Love you!

  2. Every day I wake up so eager to read about my new neices! I remember you posting a week or so back that someone asked if you were pregnant because you had "that glow." Well, maybe it's just the new perm :) but you are absolutely glowing in each and every picture with your girls. They look so beautiful and happy too! I can't wait to meet them. Brian, Aidan and Ella feel the same way! I'm sure Liam and Reese do too. :) Can't wait to hear all the details when you are home!

  3. WOW. What a wonderful, amazing post. Thank you so much for sharing.

  4. Loving to read about your journey!!! What a Blessing!!! Praying more will open up to adopting!!! It is the hardest joy you can experience, but ALWAYS worth it ALL!!!!

  5. Glad to hear today was better for you:)...we said goodbye yesterday:(..I'll blog later..

  6. What a great post! Isn't God amazing in the way He works? I've heard it said that we can know we're in line with God's plans for us when we're being asked by Him to do something that leaves us with a huge question of "MMMMEEE?" God knew all along that these little ladies were yours & Johns :) How awesome is that?! I have no doubt that both your princesses will bloom and have you in bloom once your all home together. I love your willingness to move forward in obediance even when it seemed scary. Your rewards are GREAT :D Praying for a safe trip home. Hugs, alysha